Oct 29, 2009

IRON THIRST - QUERY - REVISED

Click here to read the original query. (Originally posted as Vanishing Iron)
Click here to read the revised query.
Click here to read the first three pages (original submission).
Click here to read the revised sample pages.

Dear Ms. Agent,

The why I picked you paragraph.

It was to be a party like no other, but Felicity soon learns that not everyone at DragonCon is in costume. Some of those fangs are real and are quite thirsty.

Felicity Johnson is a sales assistant at a brokerage firm in Atlanta. It’s not rocket science, but it pays the bills. For a nice break from the norm, she and her friends decide to attend DragonCon, the convention that celebrates everything science fiction and fantasy; this year they even dress up. The day starts with adventure, laughter, and amazement at all there is to see and do at DragonCon, but the night ends in disaster. Felicity stumbles into a crime scene, and at the center is one friend’s mangled body, which looks as if rabid bears attacked him. And to top it off, the friend that was with him, he’s vanished.

Unsure if she should be grieving one or two, Felicity turns to Blake Richmond and his team. Blake, and his much too lovely chest, try to heal her broken heart and to help her find her missing best friend, but in the process, he is forced to reveal to her the existence of vampires, a secret that he was sworn to protect, and a little tidbit that she could gladly live without. Ultimately, the search puts Felicity in danger of both death and falling in love, neither of which she has time for at the moment.

IRON THIRST is an urban fantasy with a chick lit feel. It is complete at 80,000 words and is the first in an open-ended series.

My day job is as a sales assistant at a brokerage firm. To add a little flavor to the protagonist, I used my experience to highlight the humorous in’s and out’s that exist from everyday cubicle life, something I think that many people can relate to. I am a member of the Atlanta Writers Club and Sisters in Crime.

Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,
Me